>Mets’ right fielder and noted Baseball Prospectus writer Jeff Francoeur held a chat with fans at Mets.com yesterday. Here are some of the highlights, in the form of a tribute to FJM, MST3K, and all who found fame through the mocking of others:
joem22: Q: Hey Jeff — you had such a good second half of the season with the Mets last season. What do you think made the difference?
Oh oh! I know! Luck. Randomness. His BABIP jumped from .281 with Atlanta to .343 with the Mets and his home-run-to-fly-ball rate doubled. He actually walked less, so his plate discipline certainly didn’t improve.
Jeff Francoeur: First a change of atmosphere was nice,
Oh right, I forgot who was being asked the questions.
and working with HoJo made some adjustments in my stance and my swing. Getting out of Atlanta … I was born and raised there. …
So . . . many . . . periods . . . .
It was nice to have a change of scenery with some high energy fans.
Hold it right there. As if anyone likes John Maine enough to actually make a name like that. This has to be the real John Maine, or at the very least a close relative.
maineiac33: Q: Jeff we are so happy you are a Met! You gave us reason to smile in a tough year.
This is John Maine. Actually it could also be H.M. the Queen of England because of all that bizarre royal plural “we” and “us” stuff.
Have you been hanging out with your Mets teammates in the offseason?
Interesting. It looks like Jeff Francoeur and the other Mets haven’t been returning someone’s phone calls.
P.S. Still looking for places to eat in New York? Go to Freddy’s in Whitestone for the best pizza.
John Maine has no friends and eats every meal in agonizing loneliness. Someone please help him out.
Jeff Francoeur: Thanks! I love pizza.
In the words of Billy Wagner, “f***in’ shocker.” Someone likes pizza.
And I will for sure try it! Yes … I’m in a fantasy football league with all the players on the team,
except for that geek John Maine,
so we keep in touch through that. And Kurt Warner cost me the second round of the playoffs!!!
I’m honestly surprised that Frenchy hasn’t ended every sentence with multiple exclamation points.
maineiac33: Q: What song do you think you will use as your at-bat song this season? Also, I’m so lonely in the clubhouse. Will you be my friend?
Okay, maybe John Maine didn’t write those last two sentences.
Jeff Francoeur: I’m gonna have a couple country and maybe some rock or rap, but definitely “Chicken Fried” by the Zac Brown Band.
Thanks for making me dread your at-bats even more, Jeff.
jcthree03: Q: Hello Jeff. First, I hope this chat isn’t hurting your thumbs.
I’m confused by this. Is it possible that jcthree03 typed this entire question with just his thumbs, and he thinks Francoeur is doing the same? Go on, jcthree03.
As a huge fan of yours before you even came to N.Y. when did you first feel like a “Hey, I am officially a N.Y. Met.” Also, are you enjoying N.Y.?
The fact that jcthree03 used “N.Y.” three times in two sentences makes me wonder if he knows what the abbreviation actually stands for. EDIT: Realized that it’s actually supposed to be three sentences. Punctuation threw me off. Is it possible that jcthree03 has been living in New York City for a couple of years now and he can’t ask anyone what “N.Y.” stands for without horribly embarrassing himself?
Oh wait, I’ve got it. He’s using the abbreviations to save time because it takes him forever to type with only his thumbs.
Jeff Francoeur: My thumb is hangin’ in there!
Because, like most people, Francoeur only uses it for the space bar.
Jeff Francoeur will now cease using actually sentences.
Probably about a month or so I felt like a Met.
He meant to say that he didn’t feel like a Met until he injured himself. Also, where did the missing “after” sneak off to?
After I played the Braves a couple times and really wanted to beat them bad.
Oh, there it is. Jeff Francoeur is 0 for 2 in his last two sentences. That’s okay, because they don’t put sentence average on the scoreboard.
xbignick: Q: Can you beat David Wright in a foot race? I heard he also wants you to play cards all the time.
This is more enjoyable if you pretend that xbignick is talking about Pokemon cards, or alternatively Yu-gi-oh cards, if you were one of those uncomfortably geeky kids.
Jeff Francoeur: I think it’ll be a close race, but I think my long legs will get him in the end. He is obsessed with cards!
Jeff Francoeur and David Wright play baseball, have foot races, and play Pokemon cards. In other news, Jeff Francoeur and David Wright are the eight year old version of me.
They also avoid talking to that loser Maine.
jgonz24: Q: How do you feel about possibly facing Halladay next season?
Jeff Francoeur: No biggie, I’m 1-for-3 with an infield single, haha.
I just checked that. He’s actually 1-3 with an infield single and 3 walks. But who cares about walks, right Jeff?
It will be a great challenge for us a team to face him 3 or 4 times a year. It’s always fun to face one of the best!
Just kidding. Of course he has no walks against Halladay. He’s really just 1-3. Still, Jeff Francoeur is a career .333 hitter against Roy Halladay! Look out Phillies!
Watch this at your own risk: